CHANNELING MY INNER PEGGY BUNDY

Because there is a little animal print dressed waist belted Peggy Bundy inside all of us waiting to get out every once in a while. Or, in some of us at least. Especially if you are on your way to watch young beefy men strut around in very small and tight sequin swim pants (that would be Tyra Therman's quirky male underwear show, suitably timed for Pride week) and go watch a drag show afterwards.
But yes I know my hair is a tad bit too small tough.

The velvet leo-leggings are from Sockdreams.

PAIRS IN COLOUR

 Green & orange.

 Purple & yellow.

Red & blue.

YELLOW VINTAGE SUMMER DRESS WITH SOME BLACK ON THE SIDE

Even though summer got some sort of bug and forgot to load properly after a promising start I defied the shitty weather and took a night off for tiki drinks in a summer dress! This one has not made it out in the sun enough, yet. This dress has more of an empire waist but worn with a broad belt this time the waist sneaks back to it's own place.

Turns out the tiki bar was closed, but you can't always win now can you.

The shoes are old and the rest is vintage form here and there.
(I apparently have a thing for mixing yellow with black.)

SHADES OF COOL FOR THIS SUMMER SUNDAY

Most Finnish people will still be out of reach of -or not interested in -the internet right now, post drunk and hungover from Midsummer, but for everyone else in the world, here is some Soft Sunday music.

No one can make living in a valium haze, getting shitfaced on daiquiris by 2p.m. or haunting your old lover's life with the bittersweet memories of you look as good as Lana Del Rey. I don't like all of her songs, but the ones I like I love. This is such a sad and beautiful video I've watched over and over; I've always loved Lana's appearance and also how she makes her videos look just like she sounds.

DAG'S CAKE - A QUICK ALMOND AND FRUIT CAKE

Here's a quick cake I made for Dag', not for his birthday actually but for his name's day some time ago.

The original recipe uses apples and marzipan (or, actually almond mass, which is almost the same) but I made my own by mixing almonds and sugar; then you can choose how sweet you want it, and added nectarines and strawberries.  I used so called Indian Sugar which is a little bit healthier than regular, white sugar. (I would have done this with coconut sugar but didn't have any at home). The cake is basically just marzipan and eggs. So it's gluten free for those who can't have it. We buy our eggs directly from an organic farm.

You will need:
3 eggs
300 grams of marzipan store bought/home made
2 nectarines
Fresh strawberries

Mix the almonds with the eggs in a kitchen mixer or by hand, using a fork at first and then a wooden spoon.

Pour the mix in a cake mold and decorate with thin slices of nectarine.

Bake in a 200C oven for 10-15 minutes.

 Let cool and decorate with fresh, chopped strawberries.
(See the small impatient hands in the background, waiting to grab the cake. Aaaw.)

Serve with something white with vanilla - I mixed some real vanilla with thick Turkish yoghurt.

And enjoy!

I'm thinking a version with our sugar, with an almond-date mix instead could work too.
I would also like to make a vegan version out of this, perhaps with some soy yoghurt instead of the eggs. Let's see what I come up with!

TWO YEARS!

 Having birthday pancakes!

Last night two years ago I had the strangest pizza of my life - eight days before Dag was due my water broke Niagra-falls style at a launch party I was at. After being monitored for some time at the hospital they sent me home in the evening to await the labour (pains) to begin, or to return in the morning to get it started for me. It was around ten p.m and we hadn't eaten during the day so we stopped at an Italian restaurant on the way home. I had a pizza and it felt rather absurd to sit there munching it, knowing that the next day our baby would be with us. Some memories are such that you can't really place them; they feel like they could be five years or five weeks ago, but this one feels like a lifetime ago already.

Dag about one hour old.

And today my little baby turned two already! Time goes so fast!

 Opening his big present.

A trrctr! Tactoo! Trr! 

And a paaanda!

Dag has developed into a charming little person, and also a very stubborn little one. It gets more fun to be around him day by day, as he interacts more all the time, naturally, developing from baby to toddler to child.  Which means he can also be very annoying.  Which he usually makes up to by giving you a truly genuine hug with all the love a two-year-old-with-half-of-his-sandwich-mashed-out-over-his-hands (that are now nestled in your hair) can, and a big gooey kiss on top of that. Saying MOM! and being very sorry for pulling the cat's tail for the n:th time.

And just like the love to any other person or living creature develops by time so does the love to a child. You grow to love your child more; it's a very different kind of love that I have towards my son now than I did when I he was a newborn.

Before you become a parent you always hear about how you will have your hands full and how absolute it is. And you get it, even though you can't really realise what it will be like, to have someone so dependent on you, before you have that little caterpillar in your lap and instantly learn that it is constant, there are no free seconds, it is ON all of the time. I did have something of a clue as we already lived with Dag's half brothers although they of course are much older. But I was a bit surprised (and, yes, annoyed) the first year over how everything always was about the kids' schedule, when they would need to eat and be; all arrangements had to be made according to them, they way it is when you have children - so I had some training. But thinking back now the 24/7 babyperiod was over rather soon, after a few months it was smooth sailing; eating, getting dressed, going out, taking a shower (or a piss for that matter too) and all that gets easy after a while. (Altough, leaving the house will not be the same for another ten years or so. It takes so, muh.more.time to exit trough the door...) By now I've almost forgot how it was like to have a tiny baby! Well, both my sisters and Eddi's brother will have babies during the following months (bye bye babysitting grandparents, damn!) so I will be reminded...

And if the constant on-duty of being a parent is something that is not possible to comprehend before you are there, so is the parental love. I thought it would be similar to the love of you pet, perhaps the closest you can get to imagine it if you don't have children, but stronger. And yes perhaps it is like that, but of course different too. (Well, sometimes I compare babies and small children to puppies too. They are always crazy happy to see you, for example. Hehe. ) And as with any love it comes with worries as well, and also with the worlds strongest urge to protect. The love for you child s filled with parents-only moments with stings of your heart melting over the smallest things, his small shoulders bending over a toy car,  over how much happiness a slice of apple can bring, or a truck driving by "THERE! LOOK!" and aaaaw how well and concentrated he eats with a fork and tries to pick up his macaroni one by one and there he's pouring out one and a half litre of -what, wait, uh-oh, NO DAG NO!

BLUE JEANS

I got around getting myself a pair of blue jeans, like I had been thinking about and searching for, quite suitably before our summer here got into some kind of syntax error mode and dropped the temperature back to April...


In the end I went for a black horse and did get any of the common brands I'd thought of but grabbed these from Emmy Design instead. They cost a whole lot more than Freddies, Collectif or Vivien's (a swooning 160 euros) but it was not an issue for me this time as I suitably had a gift card to use for Pin-Up Garage, that carries Emmy, that I got for modelling for them once.

These jeans have a hidden zipper inside the pocket which is pretty neat but on the other hand also makes them a bit tricky to close. Otherwise they are great and rather comfy, which you know nowadays is a criteria for me to ever wear anything. I'm still a person with some sort of pants issues though -I always tend to go for the skirts anyway - so now I just have to learn to be practical when needed and actually use my jeans more often than just sometimes.

AND ONE DAY IT WILL BE A -RATHER TINY - JUNGLE IN HERE

If I like it a green and lush and a little wild in my garden I also prefer so indoors. You know I like to keep lots of plants indoors and have now started gathering bigger greens to slowly fill up the living room.

Not only because I like it how big plants can blend in the interior or even be used to divide a room and how they maintain good air, but also as it was common back in the days with huge plants and so goes with the style of the room and it's old furniture.


The latest plant I recently rescued from my parents' garage where it had been set away to die as it had turn a bit floppy and had no place of it's own. I replanted it and am keeping my fingers crossed that it will recover and grow huge and green and healthy soon.

IN AND AROUND THE EVENING GARDEN

There are lots of flowers blooming here and there in my garden. I mostly let them tend to themselves.

So things get a little wild, but that's OK. Here we have a mix of (edible) weeds (edible and healthy, what a great excuse to just keep them there!). strawberries, chive and parsley. Plus some random flowers that have found their way there trough the wind.

 

The garden is very well set originally though, by Eddi's grand-aunts and parents. There is always something blooming and when those flowers have faded the next ones are on their way.

 My little gardener.

Saying good night to the lambs.

Brothers and farmers. Talking farm stuff.

 

I love these light nordic summer nights - it's past eleven int the evening when I took this photo!

THE DIFFERENCE OF A DETAIL

When it comes to personal style preferences may come and go, the hues may vary so to say but the basic idea stays the same. Well, for me, at least. The past year(s) I have tend to go (back) for more timeless pieces and combos that can be styled into pretty much anything depending on what I'm are feeling for the moment. Because in most cases it is not really about what you wear, but how you wear it and what you wear it with.


Here outfitting myself in a pair of old black shorts (which I rather seldom wear, shorts, in general) and a plain cotton shirt. That depending on what shoes or hair I have with it can look like pretty much anything.


A head scarf can serve as something of an instant retrofier.


While popping Eddi's hat on -I sometimes do here on the farm for no apparent reason- the combo gets kind of young and hipster. (And here young people and hipsters are probably shaking their head 'uuummm... No'. But to my eyes at least!)

PARK PICNIC

Yesterday we were supposed to go to a 1950's picnic organised by the city as part of a photo exhibition with motifs from that era but the constant rain ruined those plans. Well, at least we had just managed to have a little picnic of our own in the park outside our building before, so we were not left totally picnic-less.

Breakfast pink ith avocado sandwiches and some pancake with freshly made rhubarb jam. Panda-boy decided to eat both at once just in case I would end up having more than him; he always seems to be very concerned with that.

Park view. Tapiola; nowadays a constant mix of nature and construction sites.

Oh summer, how I have waited for this!

Sometimes happiness is a kid and a ball.

For a short while at least. Then he was very eager on me putting my shows on and us moving on. The playground calling!

THE STRANGE LONGING FOR DIRTY CLOTHING, OILY GLOVES AND HAVING YOUR HAIR MESSED UP BY WEARING A CAP FOR TEN HOURS OR MORE.

I was driving home from a show we did tonight with a glitter-heavy lid and lashes tickling my eyebrows, and as always when heading west to where we live I drove past the harbour. And I always give it  a look as I go by and think of the guys out there in between cars and trucks, next to the ship, loading and unchanging like I did for so many years.*

(This hello-I-am-having-a-show-soon pic from a few weeks back gets to illustrate the glitter heavy eyelid even though this here is on the ligther side sparkle-wise. But I have Disney-princess hair so there you go.)

Then I drove past a work team fixing the road in their yellow safety wear and Goddamit! every single time I see workwear I get this itch to throw my old bulky yellow reflector pants and steel cap boots - that both immediately changes the way I walk- on and head out among the trucks to get some black dirt on my jacket. In certain ways I really miss my harbour days! And in the same time I am happy not to be standing there in whatever weather it is at six in the morning, or at midnight either, for what it matters.

Me in the harbour a summer's day a long time ago.

I also remembered all those times fixing my make up and rolling my hair in our locker room and often getting the guys to, during the evening break, drive me to the venues our shows were held at. Once I had a week off went to a gig but realised I had forgotten one thing at home and was not by car so I was rather fucked but checking the time knowing it was between ships I called work and one of the guys came to pick me up and we went to get my missing showstuff. We did favours for each other all the time.

I haven't actually retired from the harbour totally; I am on an extended (unpaid) parental leave for one more year still. But even though having every third week off I don't really see how working from the afternoon to one a.m one week and from five-something a.m until the afternoon including 20+ work hours during that weekend could work for me anymore... and I never meant to stay there for as long as I did. As many others, I have an education in something totally different than what I worked with there (however working like I did was also good since it's healthy to work along other people than just creative and media, you get a different perspective...). And another and, even though I'm not exactly pulling in a fair monthly supervisor salary nowadays like before being back to being The Freelancer Of Many Things is going rather okay for now.
But we'll see what happens, never say never.

Btw I just noticed I had a whole album titled "harbour birds"with pictures of the birds in the harbour that could never quite capture what I had tried to, which often was that there were shitloads of birds in huge colonies around.

Hundreds and hundreds and they always gathered rather freakily at night and watched us.

*) 2001 to 2012 if you wondered.

SWOON AND THEN A LITTLE MORE

One of those I'm-dying-a-little-bit-just-by-lookin-at-it-from-the-corner-of-my-eye dresses.
If we'd just manage to throw that wedding party we've planned for the rest of our friends and family that were not with us in Vegas (which is, most of them) I would have the perfect reason...

(1950's vintage dress from Etsy/Dear Golden.)